I am lying in the sun
The warmth bathing my body and soul
A dragon fly floats about, and… likely
Feeling inspired by nature…
He leans over and kisses me…
Song of the Day
I remember this photo shoot well… we were on a beautiful beach in sunny Barbados, near the hotel where we’d spent the last few nights. All the exotic sights, sounds, scents, and tastes of this Caribbean island shimmered around us. A few nights ago I’d shared the stage with Regina Belle at the Barbados Music Awards. Rihanna was nominated, but couldn’t make it, but my favorite soca songstress was there – Alyson Hinds. I met her backstage and she congratulated me on my performance. OMG! Such a glamorous night, and now, a photo shoot on the beach… this must be heaven.
I remember another day by the water, many years earlier. Saturday morning. Wake up. Hurry. Get ready for work. My boyfriend and my best friend were both in town and I wasn’t looking forward to spending another warm, summer day in a dreary hospital. I know I was supposed to feel good about helping people get better, but I never saw them get better – the better they they got, the less they needed X-Rays. I was being bleak and uncharitable, but I felt so… un-alive. 9 years and counting, and I felt like my spirit was on a respirator. I would zone out and realize my hands and arms had executed tasks perfectly without any aide from my mind. X-ray… stat X-ray… CAT scan… portable X-Ray… X-Ray… stat X-ray…
I took a hot shower and got dressed, then walked to the Staten Island ferry. But instead of going to the platform where the other commuters gathered. I walked down a small winding path to the water’s edge. I was alone down here… and it was beautiful. The sound of the water on the rocks seemed to whisper secrets. The breeze against my face and arms quietly made promises. I felt peace… I felt home. I sat by the waters and called my job and told them I wouldn’t be coming back. When my supervisor offered me a raise, I knew I’d made the right decision. Oh course I did go back – I gave them 2 weeks and then I cleared my locker.
My life since then has not been all limos and photo shoots on the caribbean beaches, actually very little of it has been. But I’m awake, I’m not sleep walking through my life. I feel alive again. I believe dreams are the blueprint of our souls, they hold the power that is you. They are the trail through life’s dark forrest that leads home, so I encourage you to follow your’s… it’s never too late to live your life.
Over the summer, my green thumb brother gave me 3 plants: a hibiscus, a purple heart and a spider plant. Hibiscus plants bring back sweet memories – they grew in our yard in Guyana, and if you picked the flower at the right time between bud and blossom, you could taste the nectar. Of course that perfect time was a bit of a mystery to me, so I didn’t enjoy much hibiscus nectar growing up.
Hibiscus flowers aside, I never really had a thing for plants. My mom had a garden and tried desperately to get me involved, but it never took. My interest never went beyond climbing trees, picking fruit, and… well, the occasional hibiscus flower. That changed oh course when I started decorating my first apartment. I wanted to add some natural beauty to my Staten Island pad, so I tried my hand at the cactus – they must be the easiest plants to care for… right? Not so much in my case, alas they perished, and I figured my thumb must be yellow or red or something.
However Life is change and now I think I’m falling in love with plants and maybe they with me, at least a little. They sit on my desk and slowly turn and dance in the sunlight. Their movement slow like a meditation.
I was so mystified the other day when the hibiscus flowered. It seemed like magic had occurred over night transforming the bud into a perfect flower. I reached out to touch its petals – they were almost human, soft… baby skin. A few days later, I watched as the flower began to close her petals. I reached out to touch them again, and this time they felt as fragile as my grandmother’s skin – Gods rest her soul.
Life expresses life through everything. Plants are so different from us, they don’t look like us, they don’t act like us, they don’t even procreate like us… but I’m happy their are here.